Misis Blog – For Moms and Dads

Being able to stay at home for your children and still be able to earn an income is possibly the best-case scenario for most families.

However, it's not all sunshine and daisies when you're working at home.

You will always be on a time crunch with all the stuff you have to do: taking care of your kids, doing housework and cooking, and working on your home-based job.

While most WAHMs are at their wit's end almost every day, it's not entirely impossible to be on top of things, or even just be able to go through the day without missing a single task.

All it takes is effective time management.

Here are five practical time management tips for the busy work-at-home mom:

1. Stick to a schedule

Have some structure and routine at home. Set a schedule for all the tasks you have to do every day, and most importantly, stick to it.

While younger children won't be able to grasp the idea of a schedule, it will surprise you that babies, in particular, thrive well with routine.

It's also essential to communicate this schedule to every member of the household and enforce it whenever possible.

2. Cluster similar tasks

If possible, cluster similar tasks on a certain period during the day.

For example, you can do all the cooking (breakfast and lunch), washing the clothes, and cleaning the house during the morning before everyone is up, and then you can have most of the day for work and childcare.

3. Have a to-do list and prioritize

Every day, make it a point to jot down all the things you need to do for the day. Divide this into "For Work" and "For Home," and prioritize accordingly.

Further chunk down your tasks to "Urgent," "Can wait," and "Not important."

Better to have your to-do list on paper—it's far more satisfying to tick off items on a written list than on digital ones.

4. Set work/home boundaries

Do not be tempted to answer every work-related email and call that comes through.

Set a schedule for when you will be entertaining emails and calls, and most importantly, communicate this schedule to your co-workers and your boss.

Decent employers will definitely respect your right to privacy and work-life balance.

5. Minimize distractions

When it's time for you to work, put your cellphone on silent mode and resist the temptation to check Facebook and other non-work-related websites.

Focus on the task at hand for better efficiency. Of course, there's an exemption if the distraction comes in the form of a mini version of you (and by all means, do not ignore your child).

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Do you have other time management tips to add? Share it in the comments!

June 04, 2018 No comments

As a mother, you always need to be at your best as much as possible in order to care for your family.

When you're breastfeeding, the motivation to stay healthy for the sake of your baby is much more pertinent.

However, at some point in your breastfeeding journey, it's not impossible to fall ill—whether it's just a simple cold or something more severe.

And when a breastfeeding mother gets sick, one question plagues us: Should I continue breastfeeding my baby?

The simple answer is, it depends. Studies have shown that very few illnesses require a lactating mom to stop.

However, considerations must be taken into account when medications are involved.

So what should breastfeeding mothers do when you get sick?

Here are tips on how to manage your sickness while you're breastfeeding, and to determine whether it's safe to breastfeed while on medication.

What to Do When a Breastfeeding Mother Gets Sick

1. Consult a specialist doctor AND a lactation consultant

From my experience, it always frustrates me whenever a doctor says I should stop breastfeeding because I am sick or that there are no alternative medications that are safe for lactating moms.

To be fair to other doctors and specialists, they do have the discretion to take the safest route and advise you to temporarily stop breastfeeding.

Which is why it's recommended to consult a Lactation Consultant, in addition to your doctor.

A Lactation Consultant is a pediatrician who, as the term suggests, is an expert on lactation.

They are more well-versed and updated on medications and treatment plans that are relatively safe for breastfeeding moms.

They can also provide tips on how to manage possible health concerns that can affect your baby in relation to your sickness.

2. Double-check if your medications are safe for breastfeeding

While MIMS has always been the go-to reference for drug information, it's actually not the best one if you're checking whether a particular medication is safe for lactating moms.

Most drug manufacturers will indicate as a caveat that not enough studies were done to confirm a drug's safety for pregnancy and lactation.

How to check if a medication is safe for breastfeeding moms

Lactation Consultants are the best source of information whether the medication your doctor gave you is safe for breastfeeding moms.

If you still want to make sure and double-check, you can use the following online medical resources, all of which were provided by my Lactation Consultant:

E-Lactancia - Best resource for non-medical moms and the quickest, most convenient platform to check a drug's compatibility for breastfeeding. You only need to type in the generic name of the drug, and the website will provide you with information whether the medication is "low risk" (compatible for breastfeeding) or otherwise.
LactMed (TOXNET) - More suited for moms who are well-acquainted with medical terms. The website provides you with medical case studies and research on the toxicity level of a medication, so you need to read between the lines whether it's safe for breastfeeding or not.

For more information on medication and breastmilk, read the International Breastfeeding Centre's article here.

3. Take necessary precautions to safeguard your baby

Whether you can breastfeed or not, it's advisable to take necessary precautions to safeguard your baby from being infected.

Be sure to also ask your doctor the mode of transmission of your sickness: direct or indirect contact?

Here are other tips to prevent the spread of disease and germs around your house:

Wash your hands properly with soap and water before holding your baby, and before and after eating and using the comfort room
Use hand sanitizer in addition to proper handwashing
Wear a disposable face mask whenever possible
Cover your mouth and nose whenever you sneeze or cough, and wash your hands afterwards
Dispose tissues with phlegm and your saliva properly in a trash can, and wash your hands afterwards
In the case of direct contact transmission (for example, skin lesions), be sure to cover the area when you're breastfeeding or holding your baby

4. Maintain your milk supply

It's not uncommon for a mother's milk supply to diminish slightly during sickness.

It may be due to the medications you're taking, or simply due to the stress you're feeling while sick.

If you can breastfeed, be sure to check if you can breastfeed directly (i.e., direct latch) or indirectly (i.e., from a cup or bottle).

Breastfeed on demand to boost your milk supply, or pump on a schedule (every 2 to 4 hours).

If you can't breastfeed, then you need to pump and dump on a schedule too to maintain your milk supply.

Be also sure to watch out for signs of mastitis, an expected occurrence during abrupt temporary weaning.

Why It's Perfectly Okay to Breastfeed When a Mother Is Sick

Both bacterial and viral infections have an incubation period. That is, the time between a person is exposed to the infection and the time the first symptoms appear.

In the case of viral infections, a person is considered most contagious before he/she even feels sick.

By the time a breastfeeding mother realizes she is sick, your baby has already been exposed to the bacteria or virus.

Dr. Jack Newman, a lauded Lactation Consultant, explains that breastmilk can actually protect infants from infection.

When a lactating mother is sick and continues to breastfeed, you are protecting your baby from getting sick by providing antibodies to your baby.

Contrary to popular (and false) belief, it is rare for bacteria and viruses to be transmitted through a mother's breastmilk to her baby.

A baby may get sick, though, if the infection is transmitted by its respective mode of transmission—for example, from droplets, direct contact to the skin or fluids, air contaminants, food, water, etc.

Of course, it's always best to factor in the kind of sickness you have and the medications and treatment plan for your illness.

June 04, 2018 No comments

May—A very special month for our little family, as it marks the birth of our precious daughter. To celebrate her first birthday, I'm sharing our birth story.

It's truly a wonderful memory to reminisce, one that I never wish to forget. So here it goes:

Baby Is Coming

It was a sleepy afternoon at the office on May 10. I was working on some last-minute edits on my writing project, trying hard to concentrate while the contractions came and go.

The contractions had been kicking in since early that morning, at 15- to 30-minute intervals, until it got closer and much more pronounced as the sun started to set.

I already informed my manager that I might not be able to come in the next day.

I was not due until May 26, but the past days, I have an inkling that my baby might come sooner than expected.

As my shift ended later that day, I've already texted my husband, my OB, and the rest of my family that D-day is near: our little girl is coming.

Despite the 10-minute contractions, I still had time to eat dinner, go back to the office to get my slippers, walk around IT Park, and wait for my husband outside my office while he took a dump (I know).

Admitted

By 8:00 PM, Jerome and I arrived at the Perpetual Succour Hospital with my hospital bag in tow.

My then-pregnant sister and her husband were already there, busily prepping me on what to do next.

It was my first baby, so I didn't have a clue on where to go and what to do next.

As the nurse helped me to lie down on the gurney, I asked him if I could just walk to the Delivery Room instead. The nurse, bemused, told me I couldn't for safety reasons.

As we approached the door to the Delivery Room, I took off my jewelry and wedding ring as I hurriedly kissed and hugged Jerome.

He was visibly tense and nervous. I was too, and I wished he could go inside the DR with me, but sadly he couldn't (hospital protocol).

I was still 2 cm dilated, but the baby's head was already engaged.

The resident doctor gave me the option to go home for the night and wait it out, or have myself admitted to the hospital for monitoring.

I went for the latter option; I had a strong intuition that my labor will progress between the wee hours in the morning, and we lived a considerable distance from the hospital.

Labor Room

At around 11:00 PM, I started getting bored and hungry.

I was the only patient in the Labor Room and was strapped to the non-stress test machine all night, which meant I couldn't walk around freely.

I wasn't allowed to bring any personal items, even my phone, but I took the risk and asked the doctor if I could read a book.

Surprisingly, she said yes. I asked her to get my book from my husband, and for a few snacks and some water too.

By around 1:00 to 2:00 AM, my contractions became more regular and more painful. With every strong contraction that came, Romans 8:18 was on loop in my head:

The pain that you've been feeling can't compare to the joy that's coming.

I read my borrowed copy of Lisa, Bright and Dark while the resident doctors slept, all the while wondering what Jerome and my sisters were doing outside while waiting for me.

I munched on the cookies and brownies that Jerome gave me. It was a long, long night, and all I could do was wait, read, and eat.

Occasionally, I unstrapped myself from the non-stress test machine on my own so that I could go to the comfort room to relieve myself.

And then I strapped myself back again, confident that I did it correctly because I watched the doctor closely earlier that evening.

Come morning, I was half-expecting I was already in active labor, but to everyone's dismay, I was still 3 cm dilated.

I worried that I might be put under the knife, considering how slow my labor was progressing.

More patients started coming in at 8:00 AM. By 11:00 AM, there were already four of us in the labor room, and doctors from the Cebu Institute of Medicine relieved the night doctors.

It was also by then that my OB decided to artificially induce my labor with oxytocin.

Induced

By noon on May 11, an hour after the induction, all hell broke loose. I was in terrible pain.

I could't bring myself to eat, my book and cookies forgotten at the bedside table.

I couldn't think straight. I begged for the doctor beside me to lower the dose or to get me an epidural.

I never knew induction could be this painful.

"Ma'am, naa pa'y mas-sakit ana. Three cm pa ka (Ma'am, the pain will be worse than that. You're still at three cm)," the doctor said, attempting to soothe me.

Yeah right, I thought sarcastically.

I was positive I was more than 3 cm dilated at that point, but I was too much in pain to retaliate.

I was mostly ignored after that, and they transferred the non-stress test machine to the new patient beside me, so my contractions weren't monitored anymore.

I cried silently as the contractions became stronger and more frequent. It seemed that I only had a few minutes' respite before the contractions came again, more painful than the one before.

I couldn't resist the urge to push; it was like my body unconsciously telling me what to do.

Finally

By 2:00 PM, a resident doctor finally checked on me. As her gloved fingers hovered near my opening, about to perform an internal examination, my water broke in a large gush.

Just like that.

It was a blur of harried activity after that:

The resident doctor supporting my opening as my baby's head crowned.

The other doctors frantically calling my OB, who was thankfully only a few minutes away from the Delivery Room

The nurses and hospital staff preparing the DR.

The orderly ushering me to sit on a wheelchair to be transferred to the DR.

The nurse supporting me as I mounted myself on the delivery bed.

My OB running, her heels loud on the tiled floor.

"Okay, Kris," my OB said. "Hold the rails beside you, pull your body up, and look at me. Push!"

I did as I was told, took a deep breath, and pushed.

In a split second, I heard my baby cry. A cry so loud and determined, I couldn't believe my ears that she's finally here.

At 2:15 PM on May 11, Juliana Kate was born.

All the pain, fear, and anxiety I felt during pregnancy and labor vanished the very second I heard her strong cry—her first breath.

After she was cleaned up, she was brought to me by the midwife.

The first thing I said was her nickname that we fondly started calling her even before she was born: Kitkit.

The moment I said her name, her tiny eyes fluttered and stared back at me.

She had a curious expression on her face, and when our eyes met for the first time, my heart melted.

They say motherhood is a calling. I never knew what I wanted more in my life until that very day, the day I had Kitkit.

It was then that I knew that being her mother and being Jerome's wife was what I was made to do.

And there's no greater joy than that.

May 16, 2018 No comments

Article written by Danny Knight

Children can enhance their education, fitness, and coordination through outdoor play.

A world of discovery and activity is just beyond our back doors.

Children on the autism spectrum often respond well to the type of experiential learning that being outdoors offers.

Rather than learning through a lecture or reading, kids can learn by doing. Science, art, and other subjects become easier to understand when placed in front of children to touch and experience.

7 Backyard Learning Activities for Children with Autism

Here are some exciting backyard learning activities that are beneficial for children with autism, and some tips on how to ensure safe backyard fun:

1. Learning through nature

Set up a discovery pit for your child that will incorporate tactile learning. All this requires is setting aside an area that can be used for scientific discovery and learning about leaves, plants, insects, and rocks.

2. Movement

The outdoors allows you to expand your child’s ability to run, play, and have fun. It may be easier to develop coordination in an outdoor environment.

3. Changing up regular lessons

Try taking a normal learning activity, such as reading or doing any lesson that would usually be classroom-based, and bring it outside.

4. Relaxed observation

Spread out a big blanket, lie on your backs, and observe the sky. Watch for airplanes and birds and test creative thinking by making pictures out of the clouds.

5. Treasure hunt

Make a list of natural things in your backyard, such as flowers, tree bark, dirt, grass, and leaves. Send your child off on a scavenger hunt within some defined borders.

This activity will develop identification and memory skills while also teaching about limits, boundaries, and rules.

6. Traditional games

Take playtime to the driveway and use chalk to make a hopscotch board. Have a sidewalk chalk art show. Back in the yard, encourage a safe game of hide-and-seek.

7. Follow the leader

This game develops motor and social skills by encouraging interaction and mimicking play. Appoint someone to be the leader of the group, who then can do random activities in the backyard.

Be sure to set some ground rules first, such as not having an older child lead a younger child to do unsafe physical movements.

Backyard safety in general

Although children can learn much from their interactions outdoors, parents should be cautious of potential hazards that pose risks to children.

Tools, chemicals, and other outdoor hazards should be off-limits, and play areas should be kept slip free and free from accident-causing clutter.

While securing potentially dangerous areas is important, so too is creating safety plans and instructing your children about barriers and appropriate outdoor behavior.

Backyard pool safety

Since some children on the autism spectrum can wander if not closely monitored, backyard pool safety is especially important.

Besides ensuring that your child has basic swimming skills, there are other safety precautions to take. For example, parents can secure a pool gate and only allow access to the pool area when an adult is present.

Other safety measures include using a pool alarm, which triggers an audible sound when the surface of the pool water is disturbed.

Similar alarms are available for the gate to the pool, and it’s recommended that parents install both to add extra layers of protection.

Through interacting with nature in the backyard, children on the autism spectrum can develop skills and enhance their learning.

In addition to gaining knowledge about plants and animal life, they will develop coordination and social skills, too.

The outdoors also offers an opportunity to learn and practice new rules, which can prepare your child for school and other activities outside of the home.

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About the Author: Danny Knight

Danny is a dad living in Philadelphia. He enjoys DIY projects almost as much as raising his two children. He is the co-creator of FixItDads.com, which offers tips for home improvement projects.

May 08, 2018 No comments

Everyone seems to talk about postpartum depression (PPD). There are myriads of reference articles, research, and support groups available for PPD.

However, prenatal depression seems to be swept under the rug.

Prenatal depression, antenatal depression, or simply depression during pregnancy is a real thing.

Often, people discount the feeling as something "normal" and "expected" during pregnancy, what with all the hormones and bodily changes a woman goes through.

But the truth is, being depressed during pregnancy is not normal nor expected, just like how being clinically depressed isn't normal for non-pregnant people.

Here are some useful information on what you need to know regarding prenatal depression.

I've also included some practical tips on how to cope with depression during pregnancy—coming from someone who also struggled with prenatal depression.

What is prenatal depression?

Prenatal depression, or antenatal depression, is a form of clinical depression that occurs during pregnancy.

Like clinical depression, it's a mood disorder caused by a number of reasons, mostly attributed to a hormonal imbalance.

Causes of prenatal depression

The cause of prenatal depression is, unfortunately, poorly understood.

But studies have shown that certain risk factors may trigger depression during pregnancy:

genetics
personal history of depression
pregnancy complications
previous pregnancy loss
being in an abusive relationship
going through stressful life events like divorce, death in the family, and more

Symptoms of prenatal depression

Chances are, you're having prenatal depression if you experience the following for more than 2 weeks:

being extremely sad
constantly distracted
sleeping or eating too little or too much
being very anxious
mulling over suicide
feeling generally low

Prevalence

According to the American Congress of Obstetricians and Gynecologists (ACOG), prenatal depression affects 14% to 23% of women.

Depression during pregnancy is, in fact, not rare. But many pregnant women feel that they are alone, partly because no one seems to have the courage to talk about it.

How do you cope with depression during pregnancy?

1. Open up about your depression to someone you trust

It's sometimes really hard to open up about something that's laden with stigma, but it's one of the first steps to recovery.

Talk to someone you trust—it may be your husband, your parents or siblings, your best friend, or your pastor—the important thing is that you're comfortable talking with that person.

Tell them about your thoughts, no matter how incoherent it may sound.

The one you're talking to may not fully understand what you're going through, but just having someone to listen to you makes all the difference.

Bonus Tip: If you're not comfortable talking to someone you know, you can talk anonymously to a trained volunteer through Samaritans, a community of volunteers based in the UK who aims to help those struggling with mental health issues.

If you're living overseas like me, you can opt to email them through jo@samaritans.org.

2. Read or sing to your baby

While there aren't enough studies to prove that depression during pregnancy affects your unborn baby, it may negatively affect your capability to care for yourself, which in turn could affect your baby.

Depression could also potentially lead you to feel unattached to your baby.

To help you bond with your little one, and also to help you unwind, try reading or singing to your baby.

Read aloud children's stories and fairytales; your soothing voice can aid in your baby's vocabulary development. It also helps you keep your mind off negative thoughts.

Listen to classical music and let your baby hear it too. Studies have shown that classical music can positively impact your unborn baby's brain development.

3. Walk around your neighborhood

Exercise is one of the best and non-pharmaceutical ways to ease the symptoms of depression.

Any form of physical activity like walking around your neighborhood prompts your body to release feel-good hormones called endorphins, which can help you improve your sense of well-being.

Exercising during pregnancy also helps you maintain a healthy amount of weight gain, as well as helping you prep up for labor when the right time comes.

Bonus Tip: Walking around may not be an option for you if you're on bed rest or having a complicated pregnancy.

You can try brain-stimulating exercises instead, such as solving crossword puzzles and Sudoku.

4. Pamper yourself

Self-care is often overlooked when looking for treatment for depression.

Being able to pamper yourself by going out for a haircut, having your nails done, or simply getting a good warm shower can help you feel good, even for just a little while.

Bonus Tip: You can also ask your husband or your family to do things for you when you're feeling down in the dumps.

Ask for a back rub, breakfast in bed, or a trip to the mall to help you recharge and have a change in scenery.

5. Seek help from a professional

This sounds pretty cliché, and most websites will tell you the same thing.

But if you feel like you're becoming a threat to yourself, such as having recurrent suicidal thoughts and having bouts of rage, it may be the best option to seek help from a professional.

Try going to your nearest hospital and look for a psychiatrist.

Don't worry about the potential effects of anti-depressants while your pregnant; some brands are considered safe to use during pregnancy.

You may also be able to work out a treatment plan with your psychiatrist without needing medications.

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Battling depression during pregnancy is no easy feat. I managed to cope with mine without having to seek help from a psychiatrist.

Untreated depression during pregnancy could increase your likelihood of having postpartum depression, so it's important for the issue to be addressed early on.

If you feel that you have depression—pregnant or not—please feel free to contact Samaritans.

They were a really big help when I was pregnant and even after pregnancy when I had the baby blues.

Or you can always contact me. You can do it, Momma! :-)

March 13, 2018 No comments

Getting a passport for your baby as early as now isn't a bad idea, especially if your family already has travel plans.

What most mothers worry about is how long the wait is for setting up an appointment at the DFA Office.

The good news is, minors 7 years old and below do not need to have an appointment and can go directly to the DFA office without waiting in line.

Here are tips on how to get a passport for your baby in the Philippines:

What are the passport requirements for babies in the Philippines?

Passport requirements for minor applicants, specifically babies and those below 7 years old, are pretty straightforward:

Accomplished Application Form - Don't bother printing out one from home; the security guard at the DFA office will hand you out a new form upon entrance.
Personal Appearance of minor applicant and either parent or authorized adult companion
PSA Birth Certificate (Original) - For more information on how to get your baby's PSA/NSO birth certificate in one month, please refer to my article here: How to Get Your Baby's NSO Birth Certificate Fast in One Month (Infographic and Tips)
Passport of either parents with one (1) photocopy
Valid Government issued ID of either parent with one (1) photocopy - For a list of of valid IDs, check it out here.
School ID (if available)

Note: This list is according to the latest guidelines provided by the DFA on their website. For more information, please refer to their website here. Other requirements are also provided there for the following special circumstances:

In case applicant has No PSA Birth Certificate/Report of Birth yet
In case applicant is not accompanied by the parent/s during the application process
In case applicant is not traveling with parent/s
In case applicant is an illegitimate child in custody of the Mother
If the applicant is an Illegitimate child and mother is deceased / absent and father is unknown
If the minor applicant has undergone the process of domestic adoption
If the minor applicant is undergoing or has undergone the process of foreign adoption / Inter Country Adoption Board (ICAB) adoption process
If the applicant is a foundling and NOT for adoption

What is the best time to go to the DFA Office without an appointment?

In Facebook comments, I read that some DFA Offices have a limit of up to 80 courtesy lane applicants per day only.

I'm not sure if it's true in Cebu. Just in case, it's best to go to the DFA Office before lunch, ideally before 10:00 AM.

Who can accompany the baby at the DFA office?

Either parent or an authorized adult companion can accompany the baby at the DFA office.

In our case, both my husband and I were able to enter the office and accompany our baby.

What should babies wear during passport application?

There is honestly no hard-and-fast rule in place for the dress code.

But it's ideal to avoid sleeveless clothes for your baby. No need to wear something with a collar.

For as long as it has sleeves and looks decent, it should be okay.

In our case, we dressed up our baby in a dress without a collar but with sleeves.

Can either the mother or the father also update her/his passport together with the baby?

Yes. But only one "piggy-back" application can accompany the minor's application.

In our case, I renewed my passport and updated my name and civil status, together with our baby's passport application.

How much does the passport application cost for babies?

In DFA's website, it's stated that passport applications through the courtesy lane are considered expedited applications and therefore the expedited fee of 1, 200php applies.

However, in our case, we were able to avail of the regular fee of 950php.

Additionally, we also opted to have our passports mailed directly at home. For this, you need to pay 150php for each passport.

In our case, since it was my baby and me who applied for a passport, we paid 300php. This is because the passports are mailed separately (ours, however, arrived together on the same day).

How long will my baby's passport be available?

If you opted for the regular application, there is a lead time of 3 to 4 weeks, contrary to the promised 14 working days.

If you opted for the expedited application, there is a lead time of 1 to 2 weeks.

How many years after my baby's passport will expire?

For minors, the passport expiration is after 5 years.

Are baby strollers, baby bags, and baby carriers allowed inside the DFA Office?

Yes. Baby strollers, baby bags, and baby carriers are welcome inside the DFA Office during the application. There is more than enough space for a few strollers inside.

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So there you have it. Hope this helps. For more information, please refer to the Official DFA Website :-)

March 07, 2018 No comments